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I know it's been a while and I know the Camino is over, at least the physical bit where I have fancy pictures to show and funny stories to tell is over, but the mental bit is ongoing, forever and ever.

The Camino is only ever truly over when you go home, they say. I would like to disagree a little there. When you go home, you bring all the thoughts of the Camino with you, unless you go home and immediately forget everything. I don't think that ever happens really.  You bring it into your old life, try to stuff those extra corners into old round holes. It doesn't work. You need to start cutting away at that small little life you had carved, comfortable and rounded, no sharp edges, to make room for all the new things inside you. Maybe this is too hard for some so they just slide back into the old ways. Maybe that means throwing away some crap in your life to help the new stuff fit. For me it was my fifteen thousand body lotions and skin products that I never use, and my very last pair of heels, they are gone, dead, forever. My feet are precious and I will never put them through the torture of heels ever again. I shall never buy another pair in my life. There are also certain people that have been removed from my life, through distance and silence. It's another lesson, like the Camino, they might come back when you least expect them to, but right now they have left or I have left them behind, they are walking slower or faster than me. This is the way of life, the way of things, though it makes me sad.

My situation is a little different to others in that I'm not really moving back into an old comfortable life. I'm starting a brand new one. I'm lucky in that it is probably easier for me to make space for new things, because they might not fit in the car I'm renting to drive down, there is a lot of fresh slate happening in my life right now. I have to make sure I get it right, or at least as right as I can. I want to make sure I remember what I value now, what I can do for others and what I can only do for myself.

I do this a lot, starting over, and I'm quite lucky because I actually really enjoy it. I like seeing the potential in a new clean room, meeting new people, finding little secret places around my new neighborhood, the nearest shops, the nearest bus routes, the confidence in my own ability to always find my way. Most of all, and what I am most excited about is setting up my studio for the first time in two years. I can't wait! All the plans I have had for the past few years churling around my head are going to just roll out onto the page. I have found a Printmakers workshop around here too, Double Elephant Print Workshop, while I don't have the money yet to join, I would like to start working towards doing a series of prints based on both the Camino, and a number of other projects. Maybe this will be a way I will fit the Camino into my brand spanky new life.

There are another few things that I want to keep with me, the exercise, the open state of mind, dealing with life's little ups and downs with the same smiles and care as I did on the Camino.

There are a few things I need stop doing that I did on the Camino though. A major one is my diet. I need to cut back on the cheese and sweets, and start eating more vegetables. Damn you Spain and your terrible peregrino food. I also REALLY need to cut down on spending till I get my first paycheck. Once I get settled and fill my kitchen full of food I'm going to start seriously working on this girl's recipes. She lives on £10 a week and makes some glorious food out of the basic food that she buys.

Simplicity.

That's what I need.

But I know I'm not going to get that.

I'm going to get a very busy couple of months, back and forth to London, Edinburgh, travelling all over Europe hopefully, if I can afford it, as well as starting my new job, and all the headaches that that brings.

Life is never really simple is it? There are always more headaches, but I'll face it like I always do. There's only ever one direction to keep going, sometimes there aren't any arrows to show us but after I make a decision I stick with it. I take pride in the fact that I can make good with whatever life throws at me.

I'll keep going, try to see the simple things in all the complicated part of life.

What do you think?